Reinventing Joy

Andy Rooney Style Rant starts...now... I've never planned a wedding before.  And I'm growing frustrated daily by reading these blogs from other brides to be who know SO much about these planning details.  It's as if they went to school and got a Masters in Matrimony.   No one who's never been married can claim to know everything! Seriously!  We all have ideas and pin the hell out of what we'd like on our big day on Pinterest but unless you've been there before or are a professional wedding planner- seriously- stop acting like a know it all!  End Rant.  Petty Party over. Trying to build my coaching and speaking business and plan this small wedding has been a super challenge.   As you all know, I worry about everything.  Things are going quite well with things so far.  Got the caterer, invites, location, photographer, last dress fitting is coming up in two weeks. I joked with my fiancé this morning that once the wedding is finally here, I'll find som

It's March 6th and I'm JUST getting to blog!  I have been so busy building my business and gaining new coaching clients that I've managed to shirk most of the things that bring me joy.  Some would say growing your business is a great problem to have.  I would agree to a certain point.  I would say that I have been so focused on building my business, planning a wedding and trying to save the world- that the work stress monkey is on my back once again and I'm starting to experience some good old fashioned self induced stress symptoms.  YAS!  They're baccck! Since I'm hip to the fact that this is not how I want to live my dream job, I took a step back and started to question what the heck was going on.  Where was this stress coming from and what was the root cause? I realized like in my old job...I was owning projected stress and expectations that others were placing on my already high list of expectations.  I know it's an important gig!  I get that you

For years I would struggle and go to work sick and contagious because I needed to get the work done.  My team needed me.  The business needed me.  They can't function without me.  What I didn't realize is that when I'm not at my best, I can't be my best. Yeah, I got the work done or the webinar completed or the folks trained but they didn't get 100% Joyel, they got 50-65% at best.  That's no bueno.  Showing up while sick doesn't make you a hero.  It fosters a lack of self care which (as I slowly learned) can lead to other deeper issues along the way.  I developed larger health issues along the years that accumulated into some pretty scary stuff.  It was my body's way of signaling me to slow the hell down!  But I didn't listen until I was 4 meds in, 2 fibroid removal surgeries down and had a stress related cough that gave me a hernia to realize that working while ill is not the answer to a more productive life. I'm writing this note to all of

This whole week so far has been about Embracing Change.   Monday kicked off with my EAP Embracing Change class in Wilmington, DE where over 50 employees at a bank listened to their peers and I discuss ways to go with the flow and embrace the changes that happen to us in life.  As I shared with the class, it's not the change that does us in- it's the transition and life and our businesses won't wait too long for us to get it together.   We also discussed honoring the process and being proactive.  One wise participant discussed not giving up on the change just because we don't see immediate results.  We need to keep trying if we believe in that change and measure and celebrate the small successes on the way.  We also took away that it's ok to question the change but we need to remember to be mindful of how we're asking about the change and reframing the question to show that our intention is not to tear it down but to better understand the change.  It pay

I did it!  I got my name up in lights on a marquee after 1 year of working very hard to be heard in the Philly music scene!   Last year at the Dewey Beach Music Conference, I set the intention to the owner that I would see her next year and that I'd be performing.   I remember her saying to me "OK."(and the tone was "Who is this chick?!")  But one year later, I saw folks noticing my name on the sign while I was waiting to perform my original songs to a packed house at Jimmy's Grille in Dewey Beach, DE. I know it wasn't SXSW or the Grammy's yet but I had arrived in my own personal achievement.  This was a challenge that I took on and did it out of pocket and sheer grit and determination.   Manifestation works when you put yourself to work.   I didn't just wish on a star and hope to get selected.   I took to getting out to the local music venues, networked my tail off, played out and practiced all year long.  2 weeks before I was abou

I have been pushing myself into new experiences, or challenges that scare me to get past my fears.  I love to perform. But performing on an instrument that I'm not very good at alone has been struggle for me. I realize that I can only get better with practice.  This 7 week Mindfulness and Stress Reduction class that I completed really works! My health has never been better and my blood pressure is the best it's ever been.  I had to talk myself off the fence of fear 10 times yesterday to get the courage up to go and play at an open mic night at this really awesome music venue (World Cafe Live).  I was invited by the host (a huge step) and then it was the venue- A place where some of my most favorite artists performed.  And then it was playing my original music, without the safety net of my fiancé backing me up. My stomach was churning, I started to get a migraine, my muscles were spasming.  All the signs of anxiety that I used to feel when I was at my most stressed out las