8 days a week

So today, is Day 8 of my total vocal rest.  I've managed to go to happy hour and still have fun thanks to my friend's pad and markers! I went to the beach on a whim.  I also started to meditate.  I am quite proud of myself that I was able to accomplish this feat for so long.  It feels longer than 8 days.  

I managed to get food poisoning twice this week from bad lettuce at two different restaurants.  What are the odds with that?  I'm supposed to be eating better and I'm avoiding produce like the plague.  Hell, it gave me the plague! Keeping it light and starving!  Not the best way for weight loss at all1  My mom told me that there's a "thing" out there that is tainting the lettuce and killing folks.  That made me feel so much better!  And I'm eating salads like a friggin' rabbit because "thinner is the winner" has been my mantra for quite some time now.  But death by salad is not the way I'm going out of this world.  I'm not going down like that! 

I just got word from my manager that my claim for paid benefits will most likely be denied so I'm taking sick time to cover my absences and started to work remotely (as I originally asked her to do) today and tomorrow.

Working from home is such a terrific benefit.

I got to wake up late, workout in between answering emails and got to continue my Oprah/Deepak Chopra 21 Day Meditation Challenge. 

Today's Centering Thought:
As I love and honor myself, my relationships blossom.

I am learning as I practice meditation that in order to have long lasting loving relationships, I need to build a strong foundation with loving myself.  Don't get nasty. This is taking care of yourself, not beating yourself up and accepting the best that you can do self - love.

I went to the movies today with my spontaneous beach friend.  My treat.  We saw "The Heat".  HYSTERICAL!  

The film was a late matinee at 4:30pm- so it was pretty close to quitting time for my day at work.  I checked my phone regularly throughout the movie so that I was accountable to my work from home agreement.  And you know what?! The world didn't end.    

My poor friend.  She felt so uncomfortable about me not talking.  The more she talked about feeling badly about me not talking she kept bringing attention to the fact that I couldn't talk.  I felt for her.  She said she felt selfish having a one sided conversation.  I wanted to tell her to stop wasting her energy on me not talking and to enjoy herself.  It was ok.  But I couldn't say a thing. I just stayed silent and hoped that she could get my zen vibes and relax.  

I laughed a lot and then got paranoid that laughing was damaging my chords.  And then I relaxed and just enjoyed myself.  I laughed as quietly as I could.  It was tough because I'm a loud laughter.  I had to remember that any noise would qualify as not good so I snickered instead of my boisterous guffaws.  I forgave myself for the slips of hysterical laughing and ultimately had a good time.

After the movie, my friend and I discovered a wine bar that recently moved locations to a place that was easier to get to within the shopping center.  We made silent plans to return when I could talk.  Then we can truly enjoy ourselves and I wouldn't subject my friend to feeling self conscious about being the only one talking.  You see, I'm usually the chatterbox in our relationship.  The tables were turned and I realized this afternoon that she didn't like the change.  

I checked my work phone one more time.  The world was still spinning and no one fell apart.  

I have one more day of working from home and then I return to the madness at the office.  I really don't look forward to it.  I really am beginning to enjoy not having to say anything and just be.  I am also afraid that returning to work next week is going to undo all of the good that this vocal rest has created.

Ok, so this isn't me! But man, to have an office like this at home?! Winning!

I'm afraid to sing and talk but I'm more afraid of not being able to sing and talk for the rest of my life.  That is the really scary thing. What if I talk at work and I end up having to have surgery?  I wish I could work from home forever.  I think I need a new job.    I know I need a new job.  Le Sigh!